So deeply intertwined are our lives
Time is no match
A flash in time
Lights a flash of nine

Sunday, Jul. 02, 2006, 12:55

Tranquility in words.

Sunday, Jun. 25, 2006, 05:07

They were right when they asked if this was what keeps my heart warm.

My answer is, yes.

But in return I've made many sacrifices. Like how my bed's cold every night.

And how my face is never wet.

And now I wonder, what are bachelor parties for again?

Monday, Jun. 19, 2006, 02:02

Does content really surpass ambience?

I need to start working out or something, my metabolism is starting to sleep. heh.

That aside, its time to go back to school. boo. hoo.

Thursday, Jun. 15, 2006, 22:40

Falling for the wrong girl is a great mistake.

Thursday, Jun. 15, 2006, 12:49

Rapture gaming drew first blood.

Your head marshall never brief any of the teams about the rules and dare to dq us on first warning.

Got saved game before incident don't let us load, saying opponent want dq.

Opponent say no choice marshall say dq.

G_G lose to opponent and marshall combo.

I hope you're happy getting this dq, because the next time I see you it will be bm heaven.

Wednesday, Jun. 14, 2006, 16:34

Thinking of moving to livejournal. Comments?

Tuesday, Jun. 13, 2006, 23:13

Mm.. if.. going to school at 8.30am is bad.. what about playing dota at 9.30am in school?

I don't know, RP's so far away, nobody is gonna come have lunch with me. Ah well.

Tuesday, Jun. 13, 2006, 06:15

A friend I used to know suddenly blossomed. The change was breathtaking, and absolutely shocking. To be honest, I'm lost for words.

Tuesday, Jun. 13, 2006, 05:38

Hm. I think I've reached that age where they say "you don't know what you want". I don't mean literally, of course I know what I want. But you just don't have that sense of priority. Because hey, I want everything. ;o

Well I'm just glad that the team's finally performing, but I'm depressed to see the departure of a teammate. It can't be helped I guess. I'm starting to feel like an adult, all independent and left with nothing to fall back on. Its fulfilling, when I screw up and manage to make up for my own mistakes.

But the darkest hours are not times when I screw up, they are the times when I have nothing to do. The loneliness sets in, and you can feel the depression sweep past you like a storm in the desert.

Yea I know, I'm single and its probably majorly my fault.

So yea, here I am at 5.45am in the morning thinking of why I'm single.

To digress, I was bloghopping and I came across lynette. What can I say?

Okay la, lynette is like super talkative and her mouth never stops. Then I tried to pretend I didn't know her at all and it hit me.

Wow, lynette watches soccer, watches anime, is rather nice to people, looks able to care for people, and looks fairly easy to get along with.

Eh? How come the lynette I know doesn't fit any of that?

Okay I know I'm sprouting rubbish. Just experimenting with perception. ^^;

Friday, Jun. 09, 2006, 17:53

Sometimes I feel underappreciated, but I know its just my imagination. I know you guys love me, but I just need to address my issues. I'm working on it, and you guys should really encourage me sometimes. There's so much I can take after all.

Friday, Jun. 09, 2006, 08:36

Taken off Elle why

Reminds me of how I had to call my florist the following month to tell her not to save me roses every month because I was single again.

there's a reason why

Each year he sent her roses, and the note would always say,"I love you even more this year, than last year on this day. My love for you will always grow, with every passing year."

She knew this was the last time that the roses would appear. She thought he ordered the roses in advance before this day. Her loving husband did not know that he would pass away. He always liked to do things early, well before their time. Then if he got busy, everything would work out fine.

She trimmed the stems and placed them in a very special vase. Then sat the vase beside the portrait of his smiling face. She would sit for hours in her husband's favorite chair. While staring at the picture and the roses sitting there.

A year went by and it was to live without her mate. With loneliness and solitude that had become her fate. Then, that very hour, the doorbell rang and there were roses sitting by her door. She brought the roses in, and just looked at them in shock. Then went to get the telephone to call the florist shop. The owner answered and she asked him if he would explain,why would someone do this to her and cause her such pain?

"I know your husband passed away more than a year ago",the owner said. "I knew you'd call and you would want to know. The flowers you received today were paid for in advance. Your husband always planned ahead. He left nothing to chance. There is a standing order, that I have on file down here. And he has paid well in advance. You'll get them every year. There is also another thing that I think that you should know, he wrote a special little card... he did this years ago. Then, should ever I find out that he's no longer here, that's the card that should be sent to you the following year."

She thanked him and hung up the phone, her tears now flowing hard. Her fingers shaking as she slowly reached to get the card. Inside the card, she saw that he had written her a note. Then she stared in total silence. This is what he wrote.

"Hello, my love, I know it's been a year since I've been gone. I hope it hasn't been too hard for you to overcome. I know it must be lonely and the pain is very real. Or if it was the other way, I know how I would feel. The love we shared made everything so beautiful in life. I loved you more than words could say, you were the perfect wife. You were my friend and lover. You fulfilled my every need. I know it's only been a year, but please try not to grieve. I want you to be happy, even when you shed your tears. That is why the roses will be sent to you for years. When you get these roses, think of all the happiness that we had together and how both of us were blessed. I have always loved you and I know I always will. But, my love, you must go on. You have some living still. Please try to find happiness while living out your days. I know it is not easy, but I hope you find some ways. The roses will come every year, and they will only stop when your door is not answered when the florist stops to knock. He will come five times that day, in case you have gone out. But after his last visit he will know without a doubt. To take the roses to the place where I've instructed him and place the roses where we are together once again."

Thursday, Jun. 08, 2006, 06:09

I watched Jerry Maguire again, why?

I forgot what the ending was like, I forgot what it felt like to share the ups and downs of that movie.

Yes, I don't deny it. I missed you too.

I just felt pensive, and my heart led me to that disc hidden under my pile of junk.

Thank you for this wonderful gift, I don't think this'll be the last time I watch it.

I also realised, I love -DreamZ-. Because we're willing to fight for what we want, as friends, as a team, as brothers, as family, and even the tacticians would die for the greater good.

Sure, I slog my heart out, but I love my life.

And it would have been so complete with you, but I'm through with sob stories.

Lets just not bring up the past.

I love my life, only because you contributed to it.

Monday, Jun. 05, 2006, 02:36

And so we decided to go out separate ways, never to turn back except to see how far the other has gone. Don't question the decision, because thats why it was made.

Thursday, Jun. 01, 2006, 02:22

I love you guys. For making me laugh at 2 in the morning. For making me laugh till it hurts to laugh. For making me not want to sleep even thought I have UT tmr. Bah, who cares? ;)

And you, I'm glad we have you.

How could I forget her? The driving force behind me. I love you.

Wednesday, May. 31, 2006, 17:28

Lei,

Where were you when we had 3 whole months to train the team? playing SRO
Where were you when I singlehandedly trained the team? playing SRO
What did the team mean to you?SRO more important.
Who was there for you when your SRO got hacked?Us

Have I not been loyal to you as a friend and a teammate?
Have I not stood by you through thick and thin?
Did I not uphold the clan name myself when you quitted for SRO?

You ask yourself,
Who does the strat planning?
Who arranges the matches?
Who watches the replays? even in school?
Who shares new information with you?

What have you done for the team?
I think even ted tries harder than you okay?

How many times has the team emphasised for the need to be honest and transparent with each other?
How many times have we asked to be told nothing but the truth?
How hard is the team trying?
How hard are you trying?
How hard will you try?

I love the team too much to let them go. But of all of them, you're the one with the greatest potential and also the greatest disappointment.
Gone are the days when I could see the difference in skill between us. And it is not because I have improved, it is because you have not improved.
I think that, is an obvious testimonial to your committment.
You made a mistake in not being honest, its not too late to admit it.

But push your luck further, and I can't guarantee my resolve won't break.

Time isn't on your side, but I guess you don't care.

Monday, May. 29, 2006, 21:48

I'm very happy. Today proved to be fruitful.

So you started out professional,
but look out for the pack of wolves behind you.
Although you live the high life,
the only time you'll hear us howl is when we hold our heads high.

Thank you, my beloved underdogs. Thank you for giving me the strength to hold my head up high.

Saturday, May. 27, 2006, 19:43

I figured, lets do it properly. Professionally. Since thats what you wanted.

Wednesday, May. 24, 2006, 01:22

Shan,

I deleted you off my msn. You don't treat me like a friend. Perhaps we'll get the chance to be friends or more than friends again, perhaps now. But who cares.

Well congratulations, new boyfriend, and you don't ever have to look at my msn nicks again. Not like anyone asked you to look.

Now now, since you decided we couldn't end this on a good note.

You think you hate me?
Well I hate you too, for changing my perspective of love.

Because life's never gonna be the same without you.

Its gonna be better, just scarred.

Tuesday, May. 23, 2006, 17:38

I guess I need to think again. Seems like sincerity is my downfall. Playing Mr nice guy was never easy, its about time I learnt to be a little selfish. And cautious. I trust too easily.

Sunday, May. 21, 2006, 05:11

Beats a thousand litres of liquor. :) I'm happy. *bounce bounce*

Saturday, May. 20, 2006, 04:21

I tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone

but though you're still with me

I've been alone all along

Thats what we are.

But what did you want us to be?

Friday, May. 19, 2006, 04:19

I don't believe it cannot be done. I'm not giving up without trying.

Thursday, May. 18, 2006, 21:58

Do you trust me?

When 2 who do not trust go together, they only damage each other.

One who believes in only his power cannot understand that.

So, do you trust me? Because I'm trying my best to trust you, and I think I do.

Wednesday, May. 17, 2006, 22:43

I know that its true, that if I don't make my interest obvious she might not know and she might have someone else by the time I let her know.

But I'm not ready for another relationship. I'm just happy with what I have at the moment. I don't want things to change, not in the near future.

I want to take this slow, and I don't want to lose you even before we've started.

If you ever read this, I hope you understand, that I really cherish what we have, but I'm not ready for another relationship yet so it won't be fair to you if we rush into things.

Give me some time.

Wednesday, May. 17, 2006, 19:44

In the echo of my dying words,
A black hole shall replace my death.
For the enigma that I am,
You will never understand what lies within.

Do you not understand?
My charm, you cannot resist.
My call, you must avoid.
Everything that comes will fall with me, so stay away.

The name's Darchrow, the enigma.

Tuesday, May. 16, 2006, 01:19

I long to fly along the hawks, but I'm just an ostrich. Why would a hawk want to settle down with an ostrich? :')

Monday, May. 15, 2006, 11:01

Feel the change in temperature. Enjoy the breeze while I have some coffee.